TELL ME THE SECRET!

How do other moms do it?  I want to know.  Seriously.  I know that there are women out there who are successfully mothering more than one child while keeping a clean house, making dinner, and pursuing their passions.  How?  I really want to know.

Even before the baby came, my house was a mess.  It’s been a mess since we moved in, a perpetual renovation-in-the-works-ancient-house kind of situation.  But even so, dishes have never been done with any sort of regularity in this household.  Since the baby arrived, fuhgeddaboudit.

Apparently, my husband suffers from some sort of periodic short-term amnesia because every once in a while, he’ll ask me, “What are you making for dinner?”  “Ambrosia and duck a l’orange,” I reply smartly.  Come on now!  I can’t even start to think about dinner until after the squirt’s tucked away safely in bed and unconscious, and usually my thoughts lean towards anything that comes in a paper wrapper and can be microwaved in a hurry.  (Mmm, White Castle….)

As for the pursuit of one’s passions, well, I’m doing my best to pursue them (which feels pretty much like chasing my tail).  That means sneaking out of bed at 2:00 in the morning and trying to string words together on a screen through the small opening that is basically as far as my eyelids will open at that time of night.  It means plopping beloved child into beloved husband’s lap and escaping to Starbucks for a couple of hours of uninterrupted thinking/writing time.  It means frantically diving for the computer the minute a nap begins.  It also means balancing a sleeping baby across my lap while typing, trying not to elbow her head, and trying to compose fiction in bed with one leg against a sleeping baby so she feels secure and won’t wake up.

Please don’t get me wrong.  I’m not complaining.  I wanted this baby with all my heart, and I’m so happy she’s here.  I just want solutions.  I read about women with five children and bestselling novel series, and I’m agape.  How?  How do they do it?  Me wants to know!  Is it a magic feather?  (If so, how much is it, and where can I get one?)  Is it iron-clad discipline?  Do they type faster?  Are they smarter?

Anyway, if someone knows the answer, let me know.  In the meantime, my time here at Starbucks is winding to a close.  I know Fat Cat and Puppy will be waiting for me in the window completely through with each other and over the moon to see me coming up the walk.  Damn, but it’s worth it.  🙂

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